7 AMERICAN HABITS THE FRENCH FIND RUDE

A long time ago as an exchange student in the US, I remember I talked to an American and told him that French people were eating rabbit. He asked me how could I eat rabbit, that is to say how could I eat such a cute animal. However I didn't get it and I genuinely answered "with mustard" !

My Southern American middle aged self in 2007, met 2 French twenty year old kids on a ferry from the NC outer banks to the mainland. My French stinks, but I had a go. They were cycling from Montreal to Miami and I invited them to come stay with us on the coast of S Carolina, (abt 3 days time away on their cycling schedule) I gave them our address and my mobile number. My husband thought I was full goose bozo! The pair called in the afternoon & I said, come on over,and left work. ( I had drawn a map) Poor babies, they were so trepidatious! But I had baked and cooked in advance to offer them goodies to show they were honored guests if they actually showed up. And I had fluffy towels and nice soap bc if they showed, they’d certainly want a long hot bath. It is one of my favorite memories. Not only did my husband adore them, but he became special friends with the young man. The gal, what a ball we had cooking and chatting. I made them use our phone to call their families as I was fairly sure they were low on funds. They were so tired from “sleeping rough” and not having full meals, though they never admitted to such. After they figured out we were not crazy, I told them they should stay for at least one or two weeks to build up their health and they did. We still get occasional cards. I am not an outstanding person of prestige or soul, but I think of that as my ambassadorial moment to wipe out the ugly American notion that is often true. Loved those kids.

"A gentleman should always mean what he says otherwise he never says what he means." My grandfather told me a wise lesson.

I’m an American, but maybe I’m old fashioned. I too believe that when someone says we should meetup for coffee then we should actually do it.

I recently went to Paris for the first time, and I found the French people to be really friendly and kind. I'm going back again in a few months.

I'm born and raised in the US and can't stand when people say they want to "go for lunch sometime and catch up." It took me a long time to realize people were not being sincere. I've even laughed and said, "Yeah, right." And if you do initiate the get-together, be prepared to hear all kinds of excuses why "this time" or "that time" won't work. I just find it really rude and inconsiderate.

As a teenage French(Parisian) I also have other advices for tourists …Please respect them because it really annoys us …. Number 1 : please stop going in the MIDDLE OF THE ROAD to take an Instagram picture in front of Eiffel Tower or the Arc de Triomphe ! Number 2: Stop putting your feet on public transport’s seats . Number 3: Please ,stop putting your trash in the water …(It is not a joke ,it’s been several times that I have seen tourists voluntarily put waste in the Seine …One day ,a saw a mother filming her son doing that ! Those tourists seems to come from South Asia ,so it is maybe a tradition ,however don’t do it in France …) Number 4 : When you take the escalator ,please stand on the right side and leave space on the left so the hurry people can pass . Number 5: Please don’t buy items from sellers (on the floor)in front of Eiffel Tower ,they are often scammers and have no right to be on the territory,it is the same thing for the sellers of « weird food ». Number 6 : STOP FEEDING THE PIGEONS AND DUCKS !!! Last one ,Number 7: Please be polite ! Especially Americans …Sometimes with my friends we go in really touristic places and we noticed that sometimes Americans were really rude toward French people and even other tourists . For exemple ,on July 5th 2023, we were in a little restaurant near the « Tuilerie » and an American family next to us was complaining to the waitress that no celebration had been done for the 4th of July …They were literally scolding her ! They were convinced that we should celebrate Americans national day ..in France ? Sorry if it was long😅. Those advices apply not only in France but everywhere . All my support for my fellow Europeans who also live in very touristic city . Have a good day !

# 4 is super rude here in the US too, or at least all across the Midwest where I grew up. You do NOT ask someone what their personal possessions cost, from a bracelet to a house. If someone wants you to know, they will volunteer the info.

My Swiss friend has the perfect response: he whips out his calendar on his phone and asks “How about next Wednesday at noon?”

I've lived in France for over 2 decades now. What she is saying is very true. You must understand that the French love their culture as much as Texans love theirs. The French are not going to change any more than the Texans are going to change. I know because I am comfortable in France because it feels exactly like the Texas Hill Country in the 1950s through to 1990s. I'm not declaring that France is backwards. What I am trying to express is they cherish what their culture creates and supports for them personally and their community. When in Texas I am Texan but when in France I am French. It is not a big deal to resist your culture so that you can share in their culture, yet the opportunities of doing so are so wonderous and vastly expanding!

On the whole Second World War thing: In this century in particular, it does seem that every time France refuses to blindly follow the USA into whatever war, skirmish, or controversial foreign policy our government decides to adopt, people from our elected officials to our talk show hosts to everyday people trot out the “if it weren’t for us, you’d be speaking German” crap, the obvious meaning being, “France owes us.” I (as an American) like to remind these people that if it weren’t for France, we Americans would still be bowing to the King of England. BECAUSE WE WOULD. America would not have won our war for independence without France on our side. Any assistance we’ve rendered to France since then is repaying the favor.

Also please and thank you. My good friend was over from California and when we went to a offer shop, she was saying, get me a coffee, or I'll take a coffee. When I pointed out that was rude she actually said " He's a server, here to serve me!" The guy turned round and said" I am the business owner and I choose who can buy my products actually". We sat I the are for about an hour and she said" You know everyone has said Please can I have, or I'd like a ...please ." Yes, you should treat everyone with respect. Her mind was slightly blown tbh

I work with a French person and he said it is uncomfortable to talk to business colleagues about personal things unless he knows them well. Sometimes during group Teams calls we are ‘forced’, if you will, to discuss personal situations (example: family traditions, vacations, personal feelings, etc.) and that makes him uncomfortable. I feel the same, and I’m American!

One thing I liked when I was in the USA: If I said to somebody "Your dress is very nice, it suits you really well". They just said thank you. The French start squirming, and self-deprecate. No, saying thank you is the best way to respond, and that's what I do now.

Regarding the "Let's do coffee." Many years ago, my mother (American) mentioned to a friend (also American) about coming over for dinner for her birthday. Mom forgot about the conversation, but the night of the friend's birthday, friend and husband showed up at the door! Mom had to quickly order Chinese to be delivered. Don't say things you don't mean.

I got a compliment from a French woman. She said she appreciated it when I said something was different and NOT weird.

I’m English. When I say “ Let’s meet up for a cuppa and catch~up”, I really mean it. I hate when people say that and you can tell they don’t mean it.

I am Canadian and started being more polite to the grocery store employees due to your videos! It has worked beautifully! I now say hi! + How are you? type things before asking my questions!

We travel internationally a lot and my own preparation is to do some homework on the region to better understand local customs and norms. When we get there, speaking simple phrases in the local language, being graceful and forgiving towards everyone goes a long way. One of our girls lived in France for two years playing professional water polo on the French Women's National Team. She would gently guide us on etiquette to be accepted into social situations without offending and this was appreciated.  We loved our time in France but I do find the French people often to be far more sensitive and less forgiving of our "Americanisms" than most other countries in Europe, Asia, South America, Africa, and the Middle East.  Grace and forgiveness regarding cultural differences probably should go both ways. While touring with a group we will often pick out the most glaring "awkward tourist" who boldly tramples local cultural norms and always insists on getting their own way. It is hard to watch.

Thank you for another good episode. I've spent a good bit of time in big, French cities. I've also tried to spend more time in small villages and towns. One thing that sticks out about Americans is that they are in such a hurry all the time. Maybe it's the rural-urban difference but in France it's pronounced. Don't act antsy when a person is slow checking out groceries. Don't get impatient waiting for a butcher or baker to 'hurry up' with the customer ahead of you. Chill out. The service person will be patient and helpful for you by taking their time just as they did with the person ahead of you.