I'm glad I was priced out of London.

Thanks so much for your lovely responses! Love hearing all of your thoughts in here. If you're new to my channel and need more context, a useful watch-next is this video where I discuss privilege, house-buying and the industrial interior design complex! WHAT LARKS ;) https://youtu.be/wRPJxi4fwXE

I'm 52, born and bred Londoner. I've read a lot of the comments on how important it is to be live in a diverse and accepting community and this is so important. But as an older person who still rents, I urge the younger generation to try and find a home to own, even one from a smaller, cheaper town, even if you're a landlord for the property and still living in the big city. By the time you're my age, you own a property outright and won't be at the mercy of insecure and ever increasing price of rentals, and the prospect of finding over a £1,000+ a month when you're old and tired or suffering ill health. I'm looking at the US and so many older people are living in cars/vans because they cannot afford a home anymore.

I am a geography teacher and I am THRILLED to see the Burgess and Hoyt models of Urban Land Use in a YouTube video. Proof that Geography matters even when you are older. 🌍🌍🌍

I am a US girly living in Kent UK. I was at the shop last week and the lady looking at my ID for alcohol said "Wow, I think I would rather be in America than here!" I thought this was very funny as an American who would like to be anywhere but home. I have traveled to 25 countries, and if I have learned anything, no one is impressed by the place that had to grow up in. It's up to us to decide if our lives are worthy and beautiful, otherwise we will prescribe to dreams given to us: move to a big city, a new country, an expensive flat, mansion, etc.

I definitely agree with the 'London or nothing' mindset being disappointing for the rest of the UK. I live in a pretty deprived part of Cumbria and we just don't really have public transport, and where we do, a single journey bus ticket is £8.10 for a 15 minute drive to the train station. Things like emergency services are based hours and hours away. Feeling quite jealous of London getting things like free school meals for every school child (not critiquing that specific policy, I entirely support free school meals, I just feel like non-London is comparatively forgotten).

It took me four exhausting years in London (living hand to mouth, flirting for free samples at Borough market, saying yes to everything) to realise I was a Kindle-and-a-cuppa tea kinda guy. Thankfully, my Irish dad had instilled into me the importance of owning property so I had my name on a buy to let before I left on my adventures. Now I’m back in Staffordshire, the only negative is that niggling feeling you’re missing out on something and that can be quite intense sometimes. I miss the diversity and randomness the most, teaching English idioms to a lady from Madrid on the tube to being tipped very generously by Claire Foy when I was a waiter. Ultimately, though, it’s where you find balance and peace. You can be the main character anywhere with the right people.

Great video. 29 y/o black guy, left London in 2020 (still on a London salary) and it's been the best decision ever - on my way to owning my own home soon (alone). I had anxieties about leaving as a minority but I wasn't going to let that keep me broke, stressed and depressed. Sure, it's fun in your 20s but eventually you have to get your shit together. Don't get me wrong though, I love London. I'd just rather live within my means (and I would come back if I could afford it comfortably).

I feel this from a completely different perspective. I moved to Berlin five years ago and I love it, even though I'm definitely not a typical Berlin resident. I love the diversity, the public transport, the culture, even the grime. And compared to where I'm from, it's still more affordable. I had the privilege to stay for a few months in a tiny German village during covid in a big, beautiful house and superficially it was lovely - green, spacious, clean, full of abundant nature, old castles and pretty little villages. But I was completely lost in that environment. I hated the small town gossip, the endless quiet, the isolation, the lack of diversity. I was trapped in a gilded cage. I now know wholeheartedly that I prefer a smaller apartment and modest living in a big city to even the most beautiful remote home, and I'm willing to make sacrifices to maintain that. I also value my friendships here immensely, and as a foreigner and single person, they're truly priceless. I know plenty of people around me who would love to move away at least part time or plan to in the future, but I know my soul wouldn't thrive in that environment.

I’ve been really struggling with this feeling lately. I’m 26 and I moved away from home town at 19 for uni and have never returned. Similar to you, I also feel like moving home means there are no opportunities or opportunities are infinitely harder to come by. Recently I’ve noticed that I miss visiting the beach in the evenings after work. I’m angry that I can’t pop in and see my parents on Wednesday night - instead I have to plan and organise a monthly trip home. I’m not there to help when they need it. I’m missing out on building a community of people that I can rely on. I’m from rural Ireland where there are three options after secondary school: 1) leave home and move away to a uni (usually in Dublin, Galway or a Belfast) that’s at least 2 - 6 hours away 2) emigrate 3) get a job as a labourer, child care assistant or shop assistant That’s it. There is no ‘commuting’ to the big city as we’re so far from one. There are 7 busses a day that serve 3 other places. To return home now would mean my career taking a huge blow and I’m angry that I have to pick between earning a decent living that I enjoy and seeing my family and building a community. I really don’t have a nice way of tying this up. I just wish ireland would change somewhat.

I'm American, and lived in London for four years back in the early 10's (think Olympics.) I LOVED my time there, but often found it a lonely, hard slog that left me with what I call my "crusty" side. I come from the American South, where people are very open, friendly, and giving (sometimes too giving, but still, we are always the first to help anyone out.) London developed my outer shell, and made it much tougher. Visa issues with my non-profit and years of singlehood loneliness led me to move back to the States. Shedding the city exterior took a while, and sometimes I still find myself unable to embrace the softer way of life here. I LOVED London, but in the long run, living there was not sustainable, and damaged my soul a little bit. I still hold a place in my heart for London, but I could not live there anymore.

When I was in Uni (Bath Spa) studying publishing it was really emphasised that the only place to get a job in publishing was in London, and the only way to even get the opportunity was to do unpaid intern work. As somebody from the Welsh valleys who didn’t have parents who could afford to keep me afloat to do unpaid intern work when I was studying that basically immediately ruled out the chance for me to work there. Also London for me was not a lifestyle I wanted. Fast forward to six years later, and I moved back to Wales after uni, I work in a ‘normal’ job doing IT I’m able to actually single handedly afford my own house in a commuter town to Cardiff. And living a middle of the road life here is really really great 😊

I really like how you mention the privilege of having secure and loving parents or family members. I've always thought this was an underappreciated factor in younger generational success ( however you define success) wherever you fall socio economically. It is sad how that was affected by covid.

Just yesterday I was in a big city and thinking "man, people here have it all" but then I remembered that I hate when it's louf outside and I can't sleep. And that I enjoy nature and that that the small city I live in has everything I need and if not, I'm only 40 mins away from the bigger cities in my country. Hearing your story reassures me that it's fine where I am because it's where I would want to live when I'm not in my 20s anymore anyway.

As a writer and a parent in the US, I can't unsee how many picture books take place in New York City, a place I've never been. It's, like, all of them, largely because that's where all of the big publishing houses in the US are. NYC and LA are also where all of the late night shows are and where almost all of the entertainment is made. The US, meanwhile, is huge. But the entertainment industry has very little curiosity about any of the thousands of towns and communities outside of those two big hubs. It has major implications in almost every part of our culture, and is a huge contributor to the political schisms and radicalization happening right now. We need stories with specificity about main characters living full lives outside of these giant cities. We need to flip the narrative.

Bristolian here! I've never been someone who wanted to live in London, but I love living in a mid-sized city and always have (well, I live in the suburbs, but still, I'm close enough). I think there needs to be a larger conversation about house prices in general in this country, like you say many Londoners have left the city but a lot of them still crave the city lifestyle so have moved to places like Bristol or Manchester instead of less popular towns, driving the costs up. Bristol is apparently the worst for it because we're like a mini London in a sense, a melting pot of different cultures and identities, full of the arts and we generally have the same kind of appeal. We now have the same problem that it's becoming too expensive for people to live here and people are being forced out. Rents are through the roof, as are house prices if you intend to buy. I'm lucky enough to own outright thanks to inheritance, but I've seen similar houses to mine in my neighbourhood being sold at about 50-75k more than they were worth just before the pandemic, and about 100-125k more than 10 years ago. It's not just a London problem anymore, it's a city problem in general which is such a shame as they are great places to live!

Something I'm thinking about is this myth that young people only exist in cities. Like if you are under the age of 40, particularly if you do not have children, you cannot live in a small town. I live in a town about an hour and a half from NYC, and it is so hard to meet anyone in my age range, though being able to make friends across generational lines brings me much joy. Statistically, there are young people, living in small towns, but there is no narrative about their lives and this makes it harder for people to imagine such a lifestyle and feels isolating while living it.

I love embracing not aspiring to be a Matilda because she’s a prodigy, but because she finds love and warmth and a good place to read. I’ve been ReContextualizing my idea of what it means to be a main character in the adventure of my life as someone who realized they’re London (New York) was a place I could visit 100 times but never live. I love New York, but I’m too anxious to feel nourished there, even as I feel pressured to legitimize myself as an artist by living there. It’s so relieving to release the idea that my creations, my actions, my home, my life are less beautiful, or meaningful, or cool because I never made it to Williamsburg. It’ll take decades to restore my middling house in my middling town, but I can be my own Ms. Honey, adopt myself, and roller skate in my living room if I want. It’s sick.

I love this video so much. I’m Welsh but spent most of my 20s living in Brussels. I truly felt like a main character living a way better life than I ever could have imagined, filled with parties and events and new friends from all over Europe. When I went through a break up and decided to move to my home town of Cardiff I felt like I’d given up/failed. Fast forward 4 years and I’m now married, own a home, have a great job and love being close to my family and spending my weekends walking along the coast or hiking up mountains. Of course there are some limitations (lack of diversity/culture etc), but I think I might be happier and more fulfilled.

I'm so glad you made this video. I grew up in the midwest of the United States and always believed I would move to a big city on the east or west coast. Instead, I ended up in a smaller city about an hour drive from my family. It took me years to realize that I was allowed to be happy with the choice I made that was informed by what was important to me and how I actually spend my time (not to mention the financial realities of getting a graduate degree in the U.S.), instead of beating myself up for not moving to a city that would have seemed like an impressive place to live to somebody else. I used to feel inferior when I heard people from bigger cities talk about the midwest with disdain, but the older I get, the more I realize I made the right choice for me, and at the end of the day, I want to be defined by my what I do and who I love, not where I live.

As a foreign student currently studying in London, making it here is seen as the ultimate achievement. Simultaneously though, surviving in London seems like this Herculean task that feels like it will take everything from you. I can totally see how it would be better for you to just move out.