Cutting People Off vs Setting Boundaries | Fridays with Tab and Chance

This Chapter of My Life is called "Limited Access." No time or energy for jealousy, envy, or for people who truly don't want to see You Shine!!

Chance: don't let your mood affect the people that need this video..that was a lovely 💜

"You can't let your mood affect all the people who need this video." This part right here is up for an Oscar. I love it! I love how you just spoke to your wife Chance and the way she looks at you

Thank you for touching on this because I had to cut off my Mom and Dad. I’ve set boundaries and they chose to walk over them, so I said enough is ENOUGH! I blocked their phone numbers and now I have peace! Was it easy, no. But was it WORTH it, yes! You don’t deserve to be abused, gaslighted, manipulated by ANYONE including your Mom, Dad, Husband, Wife, etc!

Same “anybody can get it” cut off game so serious, idc who you call yourself to be… “ I never knew you, depart from me [you are banished from my presence]”Matthew 7:23

"Set a boundary for my self so I can work on me" Wow this is so good.

I set boundaries for those that don't know boundaries exist. I cut them off when they continue to disrespect the boundaries!! Applies to everyone..family(with limits), friends, coworkers and SUPERVISORS!! I am not disrespectful, so you will not disrespect me!!

This episode is so good. Just last year I had to look at my “so called friends” and do an evaluation. I had many friends attached to me bc they loved my energy, what I can poor into them, what I can do for them. But I didn’t enter the relationship asking “myself is this fruitful or a relationship I want to be in!” Now I ask myself with every person who wants to be my friend.. what category should I place them in. I’m so much at peace now, and I love it. 🥰

The enemy can be those in your household. Relatives are connected by blood, and family is connected by love. Therefore, I am with Chance, I can forgive and forget you at the same time. 😅 Tfs

Just from the headline: I set the boundaries and let them decide to get cut off! 🤷🏽‍♀️

Chance is so real and thought-provoking! 'Agreed - anybody can get it!'

I agree with Chance on this one. Anybody can get it. When people don't respect your boundaries, they get cut off. No one is allowed to continually hurt me.

Family is usually the one or ones that need to be cut off or boundaries set. And it’s definitely hard and painful but to protect your peace and mental well being it MUST be done

I agree 💯 with Chance…being the only child taught me how to cut people off quick and know how to set healthy boundaries.

I’m with Chance; ANYBODY can get it! LOL! Real talk. Tab, you had so many quotable statements in this episode. I recently had an experience with a family member. My mom died at the top of this year, and my extremely dysfunctional family members have started trying to communicate with me more often. I guess they feel like I need their support when they don’t realize that my mom wanted me to move beyond the family dysfunction. She encouraged me to not be close to them. One person in particular, my younger female cousin, decided that it was a good idea to call me early on a Saturday morning back in July. I was on the West Coast that weekend, and she called me at 5 AM on a Saturday! There is NO ONE that I need to speak to at that time on any day. EVER! I answered the phone because I assumed that it must have been an emergency. Nope! She was calling for the heck of it. I told her that I was in Los Angeles, and she hurried up and hung the phone up. When I got back to my current residence, I explained that, as a daily practice, I do not take early morning calls. She knew that my mom was the same way, and we literally had a conversation about it. I made sure that she thoroughly understood my boundary. We even had an additional text conversation about it. However, last month, she decided to call me not once but twice at early times during the work week. The last time she did it, I confronted her via text and said that she either completely forgot about our previous conversations or it was a blatant disregard of my boundaries, but I reminded her that I do not take early morning calls. Additionally, I work for an organization founded by a high profile person (a former member of the White House) who had just died. My cousin is aware of that fact, and I told her that I was focused on getting my staff through the grieving process. I told her that when the dust settled, I would be back in touch with her. Her response was exceptionally rude. “It was 9.15 am- business hours - but my apologies. I thought that was an appropriate time for working women/family. But again, my apologies.” First of all, her flighty tail forgot that I’m one hour behind her, so it was 8:15 AM my time. However, my boundary has nothing to do with whether I’m awake and everything to do with conserving my morning energy for me and God alone. It sets the trajectory for the rest of my day, and I’m not changing that boundary to accommodate her. I quite literally had to call on Jesus AND my therapist after I read her response! I opted not to send her a message back because it wasn’t worth my energy. I had to protect my peace and redirect it to help my organization grieve WHILE still balancing my own grief with my mom‘s death in February. So, my decision was to cut my cousin off completely. I blocked her from my phone altogether. She demonstrated that she had no respect for the boundary I had already set. I had a clear conversation with her, on multiple occasions, and she still disregarded it. It was the sense of entitlement that she exhibited which upset me the most. Just because I’m single with no kids doesn’t mean I have to be available anytime she wants to talk. The mornings are my time to center myself and to talk to God. I don’t owe an explanation about that to anyone. The plot twist? SHE IS A LICENSED PROFESSIONAL COUNSELOR! if anyone knows about boundaries, it should be her! I don’t know who in the world goes to her for help, but I pray the Lord redirects them to someone who actually lives by healthy principles. Bottom line: your boundaries don’t require an explanation. If they aren’t respected, it’s time to move accordingly. Family or not. 💯

My father was the first person that made me create boundaries. His unreliability had become too much for me. So I had to set boundaries for him for my own wellbeing. I also saw my mom be emotionally abused by family and it bothered me to see her pain. So I’m like Chance… anybody can get it. 😂

When we cut ties with people, we will undoubtedly find ourselves feeling as if we have to explain ourselves to those who ask us why we felt we had to make this decision; especially those people who mutually connect us to the person of people we’ve cut ties with. Most of these middle people have good intentions, but we will find that most of them also have the agenda of convincing us to reconnect with those we’ve chosen to disconnect from. It’s exhausting having to tell our story and explain ourselves over and over. The best strategy is to let these people know that the decision you’ve made to cut ties wasn’t made to hurt those whom you’ve cut ties with. The decision was made to protect yourself. Let them know the decision you’ve made is not negotiable and nor do you feel you owe anyone an explanation for rightfully and strongly protecting your mental and emotional health and well-being. ( LEAVE, MOVE ON WITH YOU'RE LIFE....

When boundaries get crossed it's time to cut!

Dealing with this CURRENTLY during this holiday season I understand and stand with Chance 1000% if they need to be cut off you must step back a bit for the sake of your peace ❤

Y'ALL ARE PREACHING HERE!!! I had tried to explain to my 22 yr old son about me having and setting boundaries with my sister. He doesn't understand that I have to protect my well-being. Like u said Tab, my peace, my mental health, that comes first because there's only one me and I am the one who has to take care of me. So when it comes to my peace, mental and emotional health, certain ppl cannot have access to me and unfortunately my sister is one of them.