Feel Them Pulling Away? - AVOID THIS MISTAKE!
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Published 2023-01-02
If you feel them pulling away or pushing away, and what you naturally do is you lean in or you try to get them to come back to you, that energy is what is actually propelling them to do it quicker.
It is repelling them from you. And in this video, I'm gonna show you exactly what to do if they're pulling away from you so that you can maintain in your own energy, you don't feel dependent on them, and how that also signifies more attraction than you can possibly imagine.
Now, first off, I understand. I get it.
If someone pulls away or if someone's walking away, there's a natural inclination to chase them. In my own life, I've had to learn this the hard way.
The hard way was they walk away, they don't choose you, and you then decide there's something wrong with me.
I must lean in. I must get them to understand my sense of self-worth. I must show them how worthy I am. I must show them that if I fix them, no one else will do that, and I will then be indispensable.
That's the belief. But what that actually does is it actually pushes them away even more. Why? Because of this simple energy dynamic. All right?
People feel what you feel. And when you think of someone, even though you may not physically be around them, you may feel this person pulling away from you from 40 miles away, energetically.
They're not responding to your text message. They're not getting back as quickly as they used to. And you may then say, you may be thinking about them. Why are they doing that?
Why are they being that way? Why don't they don't understand how worthy I am, or how valuable I am? Or why aren't they thinking about me? And then you start sending them energy.
So energetically, you're then sending them energy. And then they feel that and they feel kind of suffocated. And they feel suffocated. So then they want more space. And then they want more space. So what do you do again?
You double down again. Let me get even energetically closer. Let me call them three more times. Let me respond to even more texts. Let me do all of this. And then what happens is they feel uncomfortable.
Like, imagine I'm right here. The whole time we're doing this video, I'm pretty close. You might be feeling like, "Dude, just back up a little bit.”
And if I were to back up a little bit like this and do the video like this, you might be like, "Aaron, come a little bit closer. I want you a little bit closer."
Or maybe not, and I just make the video from this part of the frame, right? But that's the difference. That's what you're energetically doing when you go and you have somebody that might be pulling away a little bit.
When they pull away, they're saying, "I want some space." That's it. They want some space so that they can be in their own energy and then they may find that they actually miss you.
So many times what I've done is I bring the energy back to myself and past relationships, especially when I was in high school and stuff like that, bring the energy back to myself, stop focusing on them.
And all of a sudden, they come back around. They say, they start realizing. There's more feelings there than they thought.
Or they start then realizing because it also signifies value and self-respect when you put the awareness back in yourself, when you focus on your own life.
So energetically what happens is this. Imagine this. Are you liking this video? Do you like this video? Do you like it? I'm getting so close. Come on. Don't you like it? Don't you like?
And you're like, "Dude, just back up," right? And then I back up and you're like, "Oh, I have more space now to appreciate you.
I'd actually like you to come a little bit more close." And then here I am at a natural balance part of the frame.
This is a metaphor for how it works in the dynamic of dating and the dynamic of relationship. Realize the key to a relationship is not codependency.
And when you lean in and you're trying to fix and you're trying to get someone else to come around, a lot of times what that actually is at a deeper level, too, it's trying to get somebody else to come around so they can see your sense of self-worth.
They can validate. They can approve of you. They can see that you're worthy. What ends up happening though is the opposite effect happens. It's the opposite. You think in your mind, the belief is, if I lean in, if I try to control, and they will then come around.
It works the opposite. The degree to which you let go is the degree to which you give them space is the degree to which they are empowered to figure it out themselves.
That's when they really come within their own power. So understand that for this process, the key, the mantra that you wanna remember is to just let go.
All Comments (21)
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It's such a pathetic game people play. Relationships shouldn't be difficult but people make them. If you're too nice, if you're too mean. If you give too much attention. If you don't give enough attention. If you're close. If you're distant. It's like Goldie Locks. So sad what people have come too.
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“Don’t afraid of losing someone, afraid of losing yourself.”
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When a person ignores you, they are teaching you how to live without them.
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- Bring the ENERGY back to yourself, stop focusing on them - Give them space - Don’t seek external validation - Just let go, if they don’t choose you - It’s their stuff, not yours - Stop abandoning yourself
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The quickest way to get someone's attention is to remove yours. I do not chase, I attract. What belongs to me will come to me without hardship and without pain. What I attract will stay with me. Always pursue, but do it in a frame of being cool, calm and collected. Never ever chase! Never! Avoid desperation, just patiently wait for results. She already knows how you feel, she's not going anywhere, relax.
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"Are you choosing people who are not choosing you" that's DEEP 👌🏾
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"and as you start choosing yourself, you then make a space for someone that can actually choose you"
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I would usually say before i sleep " I'm claiming back my energy now, from other people, places and situations I gave my attention to, I am now complete"
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If they're pulling away, I'll let them go. I don't have the energy to do anything about it. If they come back I'm going to say "no". I don't have time for mind games. I want to be with someone who is consistent. Been married for over 20 years.
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You pull away! I pull away! Simple! No chase here✌🏾✌🏾
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"Stop abandoning yourself", that's powerful, thank you
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But you have to keep in mind that they may end up not missing you but at least you no longer have to put that energy into something that will end up draining you. You do feel a shift in a person’s energy towards you. Everything mentioned makes so much sense.
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I was unwanted and abused as a kid. You hit the nail on the head....when I'm left feeling unwanted in this adult life, it reminds me of being young.
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Chose people who chose you, if they wanna go the door is open, they wanna stay and they show them worth the we give a chance🧘🏻♀️🕯️✨💕 this is my energy right now🧬
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Let me share with you my experience with this because it works, but only in certain ways. Let them miss you, do no contact, all those good things. But the MOST IMPORTANT THING. Work on the things YOU have issues with. Put work and time into yourself so intentionally that you literally start to become the version of yourself you always were supposed to be. They can miss you and may want to eventually come back, but ultimately if you put no effort into yourself and your own shortcomings with YOURSELF, you will not be able to fix the relationship
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Choose yourself. Choose people who choose you.
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“ it’s just fighting to avoid abandonment” … ouch… so true
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Even in your darkest moments, you are feeling something. If you're not feeling, you're simply just existing, and that isn't what living should be about.
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The only person you should always be 100% available to is yourself. Take care of yourself first and foremost, everyone is expendable.
