Healing After a Breakup | Processing Grief Guilt Anxiety and Depression
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Published 2021-08-11
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We often focus on the primary grief after a breakup but fail to consider:
Secondary losses that need to be grieved (friends, routine, role/identity, dreams)
Guilt (and the need for processing)
Changes in self reference and default mode (and the need for alterations)
Depressive symptoms that result from the stress of the breakup as well as being a part of the grieving process
Grief has 5 phases: Denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance
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All Comments (21)
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šMore videos can be found on this topic at youtube.com/playlist?list=PLcB3trehXswgdURAGHxP23Iā¦ ā¤ļøSelf help activities and worksheets and concierge coaching with Dr. Snipes can be accessed at docsnipes.com/ šOnline Courses for Continuing Education (CEU, OPD, CPD) and Substance Abuse Counselor Certificati
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I just feel so miserable & can't sleep well š I just want the pain to go away I just want this to end
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I wish everyone going through this agonizing pain well. Trust that it will get better!
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āYou made the best decisions you could with the skills you had in the moment.ā š
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38 yrs married my best friend.. abandoned me. Deceived me, hurt me.. Itās like coming off a drug addiction . Change is exhausting.
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I try to remind myself that breakups are ok because everyone has gone through this, I know it sounds weird. It's to remind me that I am not alone.
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Right with you all. I insisted on the breakup. However I loved him so much & am literally sick with grief. We will all get through ā¤
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Even after 2 years needed this...
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Dealing with a breakup of almost 6 years rn. I still have over 11,000 pictures of her and our memories together. She was a lot of my firsts and Iāll never have the love with someone else that she gave me. She was one of a kind. This is the most painful thing I have ever gone through. She ended things with me because of my lack of communication and I regret not changing when she needed me to. I have to deal with fucking up the best thing to ever happen to me. I donāt see a point in life anymore without her but I guess I have to keep going. I wish this wasnāt so hard
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4th day in a row crying idk what else to do with myself honestly
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I can tell you this hits home for me. I left after 17 yrsā¦ the worst part was separating our belongings in 2 housesā¦ the loss of losing your home for a woman is a killer. Itās never easy even if you are the one who choose to leave.
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its been 4 months. I think about her every single day. I think about the ways I screwed up, the things I could have done differently. I get mad at her for giving up, mad at myself for being so sensitive, mad at myself for the things I did and said. I've never been confident, I've always hated myself, and that took a toll on our relationship. Everyone tells me how good I was to her, how she was the problem, but that just makes me feel so much worse, because that's not how it was. I really don't know what to do anymore.
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āI will never find anyone else like thatā this is where I am now
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0:00 Objectives 0:25 Breackup Grief 3:59 Anger and Guilt 9:15 Processing Anger, Anxiety and Guilt: Feelings 15:45 Processing Anger, Anxiety and Guilt: Thoughts 21:47 Processing Anger, Anxiety and Guilt: Forgiveness 27:08 Bargaining: (Frantic / Fawning) 31:11 Depression 35:11 Adressing Depression 39:40 Moving Towards Acceptance 48:00 Summary
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Aināt it crazy! The pain! Ughā¦breathless.
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A huge thing for me is time..i cannot comprehend and accept the amount of time I've spent fixating on her and the pain. More than a year...it feels like i saw her yesterday š„
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Man this hurt I never want anyone to go through but as we can all see it happens. I want this stage in my life to be over already. God be with us all
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Thank you for posting this. I am struggling with guilt, at times it gets unbearable especially as I have abandonment trauma.
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One of the BEST videos out here on this subject. She covers so many aspects of this painful experience. I will be listening to this a few more times until it really sinks in.
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I needed this so much right now. I had rotator cuff surgery a week ago and my significant other of ten years grew cold and distant day of surgery than asked for a break day after. Having to process through this grief while raising our 4 kids on my own while I'm in recovery is painful to say the least. But, I know overtime it will get easier. I've been allowing myself to feel through all of my emotions. I isolate to cry it out, scream, write about it. Coping and pushing through depression and anxiety by reaching out to friends for support. The bargaining for ke so far has been the hardest to process through. With him still being in the home because we're still financially reliant on him, I've had to literally tell myself no out loud when the thought of texting him crosses my mind or a song comes to mind that reminds me of our breakup. Even though he wants a break, to me it's a non negotiable as breaks simply means cop out. Plus do I really want to continue to be with someone who has literally shown me they do not care about my well-being? Here's to the grief process and moving forward to acceptance.
